Birds I View

In my last post I shared pictures and thoughts about the atmosphere and view I've created in my bedroom. It's not the only area in my life which I've been very intentional about updating to reflect the beauty I want to create inside of myself. I'm not planning to go through every room, but I do want to share a little bit about my other favorite room -  the space outside.

I'm not sure when I realized having a comfortable, outdoor room really was important to me. Perhaps it was during so many work trips to Florida that I realized how much I enjoyed eating meals outside and feeling the breeze caress my skin at every possible opportunity.

Regardless of when it started, I’ve developed a habit of eating meals – morning, noon and night – and sitting outdoors surrounded by nature whenever possible. Though I still do yoga and other workouts in the gym or studio,  I also plan many of my workouts outdoors - be it through kayaking, walking, running or biking.

During the pandemic, it also became important to me to see the beauty of nature, especially flowers and birds through my windows, from my bedroom. These touches of lively color added so much brightness and joy to my life in that dark time. Ever since the pandemic ended, maintaining my deep connection with nature when I looked out the window has been really important.

When I was looking for my “perfect-for-now” home, having an outside space to enjoy my meals and see beauty was a top priority. I found that – and so much more – and now enjoy relaxing daily on a partially covered deck just outside my front door. The deck overlooks a small yard with several trees, planters filled with fragrant petunias,  and an eye-pleasing neighborhood. I set up two comfortable seating areas, and surrounded them with peaceful buddhas, twinkling fairy lights, and even some outdoor art.

When I got here, I immediately bought a bird feeder and installed it on the deck railing. I filled it with fancy shell-free seeds which I thought the local birds would love, sprinkling handfuls around the yard and along the railings eagerly anticipating the flutters and chirps that would soon arrive.

But no birds came. Not one.

Even after weeks of changing out the food and moving the feeder to a few different spots, the seed remained completely untouched, even by squirrels. A little defeated, I took the feeder down and resigned myself to the idea that maybe watching birds from my bedside and deck was a thing of the past.

Since then, I've seen a few birds in the trees and yard. They've mostly been crows and mockingbirds, but occasionally I've also seen a hawk. I've also heard songbirds, but until recently I hadn't seen any of them close by.

Then over the last few weeks, I've seen a few Blue Jays and other grey birds I cannot identify. Then this weekend, as I was thinking about how blessed I am to be here, I saw one of those Blue Jays in one of my trees. Though I was happy to see it in the yard, I still thought to myself “I really wish they would have come to the feeder. That would make things perfect.”

Fast forward to the next morning. I was writing in my journal about how grateful I am for being exactly where I am right now. I felt blessed being in my perfect-for-now-home, neighborhood, area, and city as well as immense gratitude for all the friends I have here, in my hometown, and across the country.

In that moment, I heard a noise outside the window - a tapping against the glass. When I looked up, I was greeted by a female cardinal fluttering at the window.  Almost as soon as I saw her, she flitted to the deck railing a few feet away, landing exactly where the feeder had been months ago. Immediately I felt validated that I was in the right place – and that it was time to try the feeder again.

That afternoon I brought some new bird seed (just for songbirds) and reinstalled the bird feeder in its original location. I also hung a couple of other feeders for my flying friends, placing them just outside my bedroom and living room windows. Then I relaxed and waited with patient anticipation, believing the birds were on their way.  

As I awoke the next morning, I spotted a grey-winged beauty I had never seen before sitting on a lower corner of the railing near where I’d placed some seeds. Though it wasn’t at the feeder, I took this solo sentry to be a sign – for me and the birds – that the feeder would soon be in use.   

A few minutes later, as I was writing notes about my morning meditation – I saw a flash of movement through the window. There beside the feeder was a beautiful red male cardinal – a feathered wish come true.

Happily chirping as he hopped over to the feeder to sample the seeds, I’d left him, this crimson gift immediately brought tears of joy to my eyes. A piece of the dream I’d envisioned came to life in front of my eyes.

I don’t know why it took so long for the birds to come.  Perhaps they were giving me time to settle in and relax before they trusted me enough to eat at my table. Maybe they were waiting for me to be in a place where I didn’t need them in my life in order to be happy. Or maybe they simply wanted tastier food!

I wonder if I am part of the dream the birds envisioned for their future. Whether they did or not, just like me, we are all here. From where I sit, I’ve got the perfect “Birds-I-view” and  – at least for now – my "perfect for now" place to be.

Visit me and learn more about what I’m working on at FeliciaBrown.com!